How To Tell A Powerful Story Without Losing Yourself In The Process

I’ve been searching for words to help us all get through the CoVid-19 outbreak. You may be, too. Stories are the best way I know how to help. You also may consider writing during this time if you find yourself bored, emotional, or stuck. Yes, even if you don’t consider yourself a writer.  Yet it’s important that any writing in these times lead to inner peace instead of chaotic overwhelm. How do you tell a powerful story without losing yourself in the process, especially in these stressful times?

Here’s how to find your way.

You have a story that’s unique to you. Not only unique, but transformative. It might be a coming of age tale or how you overcame the odds and achieved some success. Maybe you healed yourself of a terminal or chronic disease and want to share how you did.

Maybe skeletons stuffed layer-deep in the closets of your family history are resurrecting, pushing the door to your creative boundaries wide open. Or your family legacy, full of love, beauty, and inspiration, is bubbling up inside you, waiting to be shared with the world. Whatever the case may be, the story that only you can tell from your distinct perspective is a compelling and driving force for others.

Why do you want to share your story with others? People write to:

 Heal emotional wounding. Writing is therapeutic.
 Preserve a family legacy passed down through generations.
 Help others going through the same experience you are, or did.
 Assist you to work through a challenge and gain insights.
 Tap into your soul, dig deep, discover more of yourself.
 Share information to educate or entertain an audience.
 Keep memories alive and fresh.

First, reflect on your purpose.

Knowing your purpose from the beginning will help you plan the best writing strategy. If you are writing about a traumatic or difficult time in your life, pacing your writing and taking the necessary emotional and mental breaks will be more important than if your memoir is on the light-hearted side.

Understand the difference between genres. A memoir differs from an autobiography. A novella differs from a novel.  Decide what genre fits your story, and then outline it. Determine what your story will include based on what you want to tell, how you want to tell it, and what era you’d like to cover.

For example, a memoir is about a specific period or event in your life. An autobiography is a chronology about your entire life up until the present. If you are writing a memoir, there is no need to start at birth unless the events surrounding your entrance to the world plays a role in your story.

Keep it clear and concise.

Writing your story can be overwhelming as you get into the nitty-gritty details, and more so if you try to include too many details or give irrelevant facts. For instance, if your story is about marrying into a large, close-knit Italian family and the impact it had on your life, then you can compare and contrast life before and after. Yet keep it all relevant. No sense including your adventures going through college if it has nothing to do with your new Uncle Giovanni’s expectation that you and your spouse will move to Italy and be caretakers of his 80 acres of olive trees.

Stay balanced.

One of the pitfalls of writing is getting so emotionally invested in your project that you lose sight of the other parts of your life that need attention. Or once your story is written, you feel sad and empty for the following few weeks because of the mental toll that all the intense writing has taken on you. Keep a healthy balance between your writing time, work and family responsibilities, and leisure. Down-time is important for health–and for your the creative process. Spend some time each day doing something you find enjoyable and relaxing. Take a walk, a luxurious bath, or go for an evening out. Leading a balanced life through the writing period will keep you engaged in many activities, and when you are finished you won’t feel so lost.

Set goals.

Writers can fall into another trap. They can write intensely for days and then take a break that lasts for months (or years) before picking up the project again. To avoid falling into this pattern of starting and stopping with long intervals between, set manageable goals. Schedule weekly big blocks of time dedicated to writing. Or write for a short period each day, like one hour in the morning or evening. Be sure to choose the time you can focus most. Just create a writing schedule and stick to it. Give yourself the same respect you would give others for your time.

Believe in yourself and your story.

If you’ve achieved something against the odds, overcame a challenge, lived through a harrowing experience with your person-hood intact, learned a valuable lesson, lived a mysterious or humorous or interesting life, or have a family history to preserve, then it’s worth telling! Even if you’re writing for posterity or to leave behind something for your loved ones, your story can still encourage, inspire, and motivate. Your words and wisdom have the potential to change every person’s life that reads them.

Don’t shortchange yourself.

Only you can tell your story from your unique perspective. Other people may have gone through similar experiences, but no one handled things quite the way you did. No one lives or sees life exactly the same way as you. We can all benefit from one another’s stories, so be brave enough to share yours with the world! And take a moment to feel proud that your words can help the world now, tomorrow, and into the future.

If you’d like to talk about how Kathy Ramsperger can help you with your story, you can contact her by clicking here. Just provide your name, email, and area of interest.